What being a SAHM is all about

As much as being a Stay at Home Mum (SAHM) frequently drives me to swearing, cursing and crying (not in front of my son!) there are days like today which are fun and truly priceless.

This afternoon has been hot and humid.  A long walk along the river meant that the little hand running up behind me and grabbing mine was sweaty and sticky.  But, it was perfect.  I know that one day, sooner than I shall expect, that hand will not want to hold mine at all.  Then one day it will be a big, man hand and will dwarf mine.

After the little one announced that he wanted me to ‘snack him up’ (!), we settled on the grass by the river and watched boats, helicopters and ducks.  We took time to sit and search for four-leafed clovers and admired the daisies.  I sang (it’s ok, there was no one around...) ‘Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do...’ to him loudly, as my Grandma used to do with me. 

It got too hot so we continued on, following an official footpath sign.  However, we soon discovered we had no idea where we were.  Apart from the concern of getting home in time to cook dinner, I was a bit worried that we’d been out for some time in the heat.  I was expecting the little one to pass out from thirst as we powered up the last hill to discover the main road and a helpful bus stop to rescue us. 

An unplanned trip on the bus is about the best thing my son can think of happening in an afternoon so he was overjoyed, if a little worn out. 

Watching him after dinner watering the seeds he’d planted with husband, wearing just his t-shirt, baggy pants and wellies is an image I’d love to keep in my head for a long time.  Well, I did take some photos, but I think they’ll be seen only by a future girlfriend or for blackmail.

Maroon 5 and their bid to get me fit

Ok, so my moves are not exactly like Jagger* but thankfully the little one is happy with me jumping around the room like a loon as long as I throw in some country dancing-style moves holding his hands.  I love the song and can't sit still when it comes on the radio.  We have fun and dance around until we have to open the window and have a sit down.

Apart from making me realise how little cardio exercise I usually get, it also makes me realise how much I miss going out dancing.  When I lived in London I'd regularly spend 4-10 hours a week in a club dancing my high heels off.  These days, I can't remember when I last wore heels, let alone kicked them up.

Am I too old to be seen in a nightclub? 

*I am too scared to find out if they mean Mick - if not, then I really am too old and out of the loop!!

Chocoholic, moi?

Have a busy weekend coming up with a couple of long events to go to.  Is it wrong that this morning I was thinking that I need to get some small stashes of chocolate to take with me? 

Mind you, at the wedding tomorrow I am unlikely to be able to eat the cake (don't ask) and I know that I will get grumpy if I don't have a sugar fix at some point in the afternoon.

Perhaps it is that I have not had a decent night's sleep this week and feel in constant need of a 'pick me up'. 

I don't think I need rehab just yet.....do I?

Yum yum, delivery for CocoaPowered!

Just got yet another leaflet through the letterbox telling me how wonderful my life would be if I received a weekly box of vegetables for me and my family.  This is folded into a leaflet that tells me that I can get pizza delivered at almost any time of day or night for a bargain price. 

How useless these are.  I buy vegetables when I’m in the supermarket and I cannot eat pizza. 

What I do want to find on my doormat, however, is a leaflet offering me what I do need: the foodstuffs I do run out of, that I need stocking up on in between supermarket trips.  Chocolate.   Chocolate is the one thing I do panic about when I run out.  It is the thing that I need at almost any time of day or night.  I don’t get the same feeling about vegetables.  Besides, I always have a supply in the freezer.    

I would like to have a weekly box of chocolate delivered so I never run out.  It doesn’t have to be exclusively chocolate, of course.  It would be good to be able to ring for a delivery in the evenings too.  Especially when hubby is still at work and I really fancy some biscuits but I can’t leave the house.  

Thanks Will Self, you made my week.

Three things this week have happened to make me grumpy and want to share it.  To start with, I found a brilliant article on the BBC by Will Self: In Defence of Obscure Words.  I was really pleased to read this (not only because it is a beautiful piece of writing) as I derive a secret joy from obscure words.  Sadly, I rarely recall them for use in daily life and in my professional life I’m an avid advocate of Plain English.  The article discusses the loss of eloquent English but makes a better point about modern society and the requirement of media to ‘dumb down’.  

So is it no longer ‘cool’ to be clever?  Clearly there are a lot of clever people out there.  Considering so many more people go to university these days actually, surely there are far more academically-minded souls in the UK than ever?  The coffee shop chains should be positively over-flowing with philosophical debate, non?

Nevertheless, the tabloid press continue to tell us how more important it is to be pretty and underdressed, celebrating those that are scholarly-challenged and labelling our well-educated politicians as ‘posh’ and ‘out of touch’.  I was recently found rolling my eyes as the participants on a panel quiz show recently all denied being able to do a basic sum.  Really?  Well, what are you doing on my TV?  How do you manage to work out your self-assessment tax on your huge salary?  Why are you not embarrassed?  

On the other hand, there are people on TV who are clever.  Very clever.  Talking about space, nature, medicine.  These are ‘experts’ so it is ok for them to be clever and interviewers can ask them to talk about their subject in ‘simple terms’ for those of us at home listening or watching.  I only imagine this is in case we are embarrassed into having to reach for the dictionary to follow what they are on about.

The final trigger this week was the attack on Stephen Hester and his gardens.  I am not a Mail reader but saw the story commented on a TV show.  My first thought was ‘Wow, nice!  What a successful guy.  How do I get me a house like that?’.  Husband and I then debated as to why a ‘newspaper’ with such a broad readership doesn’t ask Mr Hester that.  Wouldn’t we all like to know how to reach such a nice place in life where we can live where we want and how we want?  Mind you, I doubt Mr Hester does either of those things considering the tough job he has.  I admire the man and would happily invite him over for dinner.   Over a bowl of pasta I’d ask him to tell me where to invest my money, what sort of pension I should have and other questions that I expect he’d have the answers to.  After all, he didn’t get to where he is by being a bit dim.  Instead of having a go at the man who is just doing a job, why don’t we use him as a resource?  If we are all so up in arms about paying for his house out of our taxes, could we not all demand that he do a weekly column telling us the secrets of his success, instead of picking him apart in a national paper?  Wouldn’t that be more beneficial to all of us?

Rant over.....for now.....I have to go and re-read my copy of The Superior Person’s Book of Words.  Thanks Will Self, you made my week.